she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
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