Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
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