ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
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