U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
third nipple confirmed
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
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