ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
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