she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
Randomize