So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
These Dirty People Haven’t Told Their SO About Their Kinky Fetish
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
As shirtless as possible
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
This is Why People Stop Sex Halfway Through
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.