i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
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