So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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