remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
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