We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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