I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
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