You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
I supernannyed him into submission
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize