If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize