she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
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