Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
We are two peas in an std pod
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
Drake has all the answers
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize
