I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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