Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
Randomize
