they need to just BURY HIM!
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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