So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
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