i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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