I'm going to rape someone's good day.
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
Randomize