dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
Good news!! I can adult!! π turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ππ
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