The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
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