I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
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