the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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