how hairy? two words: wookie tits
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
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