i just snorted my name. best moment ever
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
Randomize
