I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
She made me pour olive oil on her.
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