Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
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