I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
