first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
you win again, gameday.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
Randomize
