question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
Randomize
