what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize