Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Randomize
