I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
Randomize
