Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
you had me at cake vodka
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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