your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
The adults are the big ones right?
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
