I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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