he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
Randomize
