just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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