my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
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