yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
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