I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
Randomize
