It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
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