There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
