It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Randomize