i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
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