i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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