ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
We need to rekindle our bromance
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped