i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
