I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
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